May 10, 2008
Strange (but Effective) Tip: Pulling Yourself Together
by Sarah (May 10, 2008)
If you’re in a stressful, emotional situation where you need to express yourself clearly and get your point across (whether at work or in another relatively businesslike environment), the worst feeling is the sense that you’re not going to be able to do it without crying. I’m all for letting out emotions when you need to, but if you’re confronting a difficult person or having to explain a major mistake to an employer or client, the tears coming at exactly the wrong moment can make it a lot more challenging and fluster you even further.
I came across a strange tip that I was recently able to put into practice, and I was actually amazed that it worked. If you press your finger up against the septum of your nose (the divider between your nostrils) as you start to feel like you’re going to cry right then, you can suppress the tears. It’s surprisingly easy to do it and not make it look terribly unusual - if you put your finger across horizontally and press with your knuckle (in other words, not with the tip of your finger in a “poking” motion), and take a deep breath while you do it, it looks a little like you’re just afraid you’re about to sneeze. At worst, it’s clear that you’re a little bit upset, but doing it can stop it before it spirals out of where you feel like you’re in control of your emotions. Stopping for the breath also gives you that moment to gather your thoughts and refocus on the conversation.
I’m not sure if there’s a physiological reason why this works, but when I tried it, it gave me the feeling that my head had been cleared, when just a few seconds earlier I was sure I wasn’t going to be able to hold the tears back.
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